LATE Updates: extended cheat days, Robocop [spoilers] and more

It finally happened, as we all - let's be honest - suspected it would.

My life has become the ^ above ^ . 

Let me explain myself.

Before all of you lot get excited, some of you are on the couch right there with me, munching on something when you should be working it out for that summer boday/ #NewYearNewMe life change. But come on! 

it's hard! 

Commitment isn't easy when there's nothing but sugar pie, ice-cream, haribo, galaxy and pizza surrounding you (courtesy of your cousin visiting you from England and bringing you the goods/giving you the excuse to treat you both). And since she's been here the at home work outs have been dormant. Sorry PumpUp app,  I know this has destroyed my weekly average now >.< .

In short. My cheat day, turned into a cheat week....and I have to be careful it doesn't snowball into a cheat life.

HOWEVER. The conspiracy  does not end there. Since my supply teacher blissful workload vacation is over and I'm back to the activity planning grind etc - with the worksheets, vocab lists and all that - I haven't been able to go to Teacher's Zumba Club. Like I'm swamped with work. Can't even lie, the one time I changed into my workout gear and ran to our usual spot...tumbleweeds....and silent tears....No. One. Came. So I did what I could. Thursday we bumped into eachother in the hallway  and confessed we were all ridiculously busy and will get back on it this Monday. We shall see. That's all Ima say.

My cousin cannot say I don't love her. In spite of the fact that I dragged her inexperienced behind around a skating rink, putting both our lives at risk, and almost had us left for dead in the snowy tundra that is St. Andre-Avelin when we went snow-shoeing. When she said she was up for the cinema and wanted to see the English version of Robocop,  I did my non-driving duty. I navigated us through a 2 and a half hour journey from Buckinghamm to Hull (google that mess and see about life!) all in search of said version. Half the time I didn't know what i was doing, or if we would make it there and back alive. Don't worry I told her so everytime by some miracle (THANK you Jesus) each step of the journey was a success. Even when we made it 3/4 of the way back in the dark and I thought we were gonna have to sleep in a frosty bus shelter till the next bus came - I was wrong. All-in-all we spent about hours out of the house. Only 3 were spent in the cinema looool.

*SPOILERS*

How was Robocop? I give it a 7/10. It was sick. And I don't even really do action films when there's no romance plot or something else to counteract all that violence. But it had other elements, like, with every robot film - ethics, humanity, sacredness of life etc and even I guess to an extent euthanasia were brought into question. There were some eyebrow raising moments too though. And I'm sorry but this is where my America being the root of all war problems conspiracy shines through. Opening scene is robot drones and soldiers "liberating" Tehran. Obviously taking people out of their homes, with their hands up while giant robots roam the streets is not liberation. And OFC there is a suicide bomb attack, and the robot accidentally kills a young boy who ran out to defend his bomber father. This never gets addressed in the film. I'm just saying. Another one is the money side of the US, where billion dollar tycoons and politicians gamble away human life for the sake of a profit, bend the law and manipulate Robocop's humanity.

There was also a lot of gun violence and gore, and of course a few curse words. So why, may I ask were there under 10's in the audience? All these idiot parents brought their kids to see this and didn't even cover their eyes. Guns and stuff, ok if your kid owns video games that's nothing new but during sexytime scenes, when the boy gets killed and when Robocop's real body...or lack thereof....is shown. It's not kid friendly. Don't worry, Sam Jackson drove that point home when right at the end of the film in the last scene he let some strong F-bombs fly and every parent in the room just clenched. There was no way to un-hear it or stop it. So next time, just get a damn babysitter.

'Happy Teacher's Week
You're the best!'

As much as I love to complain about my school and how some of the staff seem to treat me. That school knows how to treat teachers. I'm just saying. So, last week as I said before in an earlier post was Teacher's Week - I didn't even know that existed. So I got hugs, kisses and insincere forced adoration from my students. It also meant we got treated to a free lunch:

Brownie bites, oatmeal bites, salad wraps, pasta, flavoured water.
My school is serious about this healthy lifestyle thing.....

Annnnnnnnnnnnd I even got a certificate from the school council for invaluable school service - we all did but still. I'm officially legit, a valued member of the school, whether the other teachers like me or not so HA!





Also, there was winter fun day at school which meant - grades 3-6 were gone for the day (hallelu!). Ofc one of the staff members also runs a strawberry farm/sugar shack so she rolled up in the playground and we all rolled hot maple syrup up on the snow with lolly sticks over last period:

After the first stick the sugar high is euphoric.

After the second you wanna be sick.

After the third you feel high again,
then it all comes crashing down, then
up almost bringing that sugary vomit forth.

And then there was Valentine's Day. Considering this is usually a 'dry as toast' holiday for me unless I'm with my ladies back home [VDay Massacre - ice-cream, pizza and criticism of chick flicks] the school VDay committee - ofc they have one, duh! - took care of the teachers, making the staff feel loved:

From the 6th to the 13th of February there will be little
treats provided by the VDay committee. Help yourselves <3.

Highlights  included:

•  Fudge brownie bites.
• Mini cherry oat cakes.
•  Moist, delicious banana cake slices 
• Chocolate covered almonds.
• Dark chocolate covered fruit drops.

This week I've decided not to expose my kids and the ridiculous things they say sometimes, but I'll instead expose my classroom. Let's have a look see at some standout books I've found in the library shall we?

First. Praise be for having these books available - you know I put these on display rotation once I found them.

Found in the graphic novels/comics box - YES x1000
Clap for Shakespeare

I am buying this for my children. Straight.
It doesn't gloss over anything but explains
everything on a child's level. Sick book.
Sick message!

If you are in favour of equal representation etc
but are ruffled by this book - relax yourself and sit down.
I am so happy to see books like this can still be out at
Christmas time(yes I know He wasn't born then jam your hype).
Even in a preferentially secular place like Quebec, equalirty
and variety of views and beliefs still have a place. Even in
my classroom library. So, shout outs to my beliefs!
Nativity story <3
#CantBeatTheMangerBaby

Now. After seeing all those positive, power forward books all of which carry important messages, are of great quality and are excellently written for children - and me, as I was so happy when I found them that I read them- check this hot mess of a book:

A.k.a. The Colonisation Of Canada : How we also stole land  from the First Nations people,
                    The US weren't the only ones!

 

"From the lands of kings and queens", whose rule they were
fleeing though I swear? #NewWorldNewRules I thought...
"Found riches" - took
Mate, you were given/shown/stole resources from the people
who were already living there. Found is a synonym of discover,
you can't discover if you weren't first.
And ofc you will catch fish if you are at waters edge and are on a boat fam.
The fish have also been living there from day.

Casually ploughing their way through someone else's country. But wait,
it's ok because they brought trains.
Rapid transportation, love Europe,
you're welcome.
Not.

I love how all the First Nations are just chilling by the water then looking
up like "Say what?!" "Oh SNAP!" and all the 'Canadians' are hi-ho-ing away
rinsing out the land.

My friend.
You are writing about cars, but you fail to explain how suddenly
black people just "appeared" in Canada and they, as well as First Nations
are now all happily wearing western clothes and chilling, working and
driving. If you can't fill in the gaps for the children, don't tell the story
man. Refer to the aforementioned books to see how it's done.
Smh, I hope they get the real story in Grade 6 or high school...

 Oh! Zumba is still going. Recent developments include:

Me when my tune comes on in class and I think I'm the business.

• Me being upgraded to 'the set pace' section at the front. Before you get excited no I'm not a zumba beast now, numbers dropped after Christmas. I figured I barely know what to do anyway let me go up front and see what she's doing so I can try and mirror a little better. Plus the grannies said I should go in front so they don't have the pressure of being in that section. So I'm now a barely certified pace setter lol.
• It was short lived. Gone are the days of me being carefree at the front of the class- I'm the only one my age and I already stick out for obvious reasons so I mainly just accept I look ridiculous and go for gusto like Pittsey here.

When girls like THIS show up to 'take a class'.

It's bad enough my instructor is like this chick.

• This is because the inevitable has happened. Girls my age (or younger- GOD FORBID!) have infiltrated the class. With their high sleek ponytails, skin-tight yoga pants and crop tops -THAT'S RIGHT. All is officially lost. I have yet to look back and check if they are pace setters who secretly crack up at me flailing around trying to keep tempo and do combination moves, sweating out my perm and unintentionally shaking everything that my mama gave me and I probably never will. I've seen them, and while they smile and are friendly, they have no need to be here imo. It's like a chef taking another chef's cooking class for the lols - why are you here though?

Ugh. I'm done. Good night.